There's a science to walking through windows..

"I am not my rosy self
Left my roses on my shelf
Take the wild ones, they're my favorites
It's the side effects that save us"





It's been a year. I think back to it often enough but the months surrounding it are a blur. How my body got from that state to this state is a complete unknown. Years of pain piled up on a skeleton that resembled a shattered mirror of itself. I don't talk about it a lot...if at all - but it's a constant. The things we do to protect ourselves. I've decided to honor myself and the temple that carried you for a sacred moment by returning to the skin I was in then. I don't want to carry around your ghost anymore in the holes of my pockets.

It's time.

"I'm trying, but I've gone
Through the glass again
Just come and find me
God loves everybody, don't remind me
I took the medicine and I went missing
Just let me hear your voice, just let me listen"

You gave me the strength to decide that I was worth it...thank you. I've forgiven myself for the failures and for the flaws. I now wear only a decorated crown of your memories. A cloak of the hurt hung at the door.

It's time.

I used to always know when I was on the right path by the appearance if a downy woodpecker, a symbol of fertility - my spirit animal. You showed up today in so many ways. Last year it was in the form of a cross.

I have the power of rhythm in my blood. The grand cardinal crossing is happening right now and I've done the work. I put crystals in the woods and allowed the light to pass thru me and onto you.

Freedom.

I will adorn with nourishment and love. I will feed you nothing but potential. Thank you for staying strong enough to carry the weight of loss and for recognizing that it's time to shed your skin and fit back into the you that is strong enough to carry the lightness of love.

Grace.







(Lyrics from Graceless by The National)